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What is your money relationship approach type?
We are always in a relationship with everyone - and everything - including money.
YES - we all have some elements of each relationship approach type within us. The intention and goal of this assessment are to discover what your "go-to" money relationship approach tends to be.
Your first answer is normally the most truthful answer. Don't get "heady" about this and allow your "thinking"/analytical mind to answer these questions. Answer how you normally approach money and the money department of your life.
ENJOY!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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When you think about money,
how would you describe your perspective?
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Optimistic / Hopeful
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsPessimistic / Negative
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsFearful / Resentful
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsDefiant / Willful
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsCasual / Don't Give it Much Attention / "Whatever!"
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Would you rather take action or would you rather have someone else take care of your finances for you?
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I am willing to take some action.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI would rather have someone
else do it / fix things for me.
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Which best describes the reason for your perspective?
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Someone took advantage of me.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsNo matter what I do (financially) - I just can't seem to get ahead.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsSomething negative happened - and I'm afraid to make other financial decisions.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI kinda thought I should not have done what I did (financially) - but I did it anyway.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI feel lost and confused about what to do with my money - so I'm not doing anything at all.
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How engaged or attentive are you with your finances?
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I don't want to be engaged at all.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsNot so much.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI'm trying to be engaged.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsEngaged - but it doesn't seem to make any difference - so why bother?
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How would you describe your money philosophy?
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I can't take it with me - so I might as well enjoy it now!
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsHigh risk equals high rewards - and I'm willing to take chances.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI'm not comfortable spending my money. I have to save it for a rainy day.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsNo matter how hard I try, I can never make enough money and get ahead.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsMaking no decision is the best decision for me.
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Add RecommendationAdd TagsI have something to prove - and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to be financially successful.
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spend it on something fun/luxurious.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "I knew it. I kept telling myself that someday this would happen - and it did!"
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "Now is a good time to buy a lottery ticket" or go to a casino.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "Now what?!"
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagshope it will last.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsinvest it in a high-risk with a potentially high reward venture.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsshare/brag about my money influx with those who doubted me.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "This will never last."
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsput it in savings.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsfeel angry that it is, perhaps, "too little" or even "too late".
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink it is still not enough.
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "I don't know how this happened - and I don't want to know. It just happened."
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Add RecommendationAdd Tagsthink: "God gave this to me and God can take this away from me, too."
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Your Result Type is Hope-For-The-Best
Hope-for-the-Best Money Relationship Approach means your go-to mode involves magical thinking, wishful thinking, “affirming for the best,” wistful imagining without taking any proactive action steps.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: “Keeping my fingers-crossed"
Theme song titles: “Wishin’ and Hopin’’” (Dusty Springfield) / “Wishing on a Star” (Rose Royce) / “King of Wishful Thinking” (Go West)
Movie title: “Wishful Thinking”
Movie quote: “After all, tomorrow is another day!” (Scarlett O’Hara from “Gone with The Wind”)
Archetype/iconic touchstones: Fingers-crossed, four-leaf clover
Shadow Side: Inaction, dependency and/or co-dependency
Light Side: Positivity, optimism, openness
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to be more engaged and proactive with the money department of my life.
Affirmation:
I am open to being more proactive and engaged with my finances.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Taking an active part in my finances is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Waiting-to-be-Rescued
The Waiting-to-be-Rescued Money Relationship Approach means your go-to mode involves fantasies of winning the lottery, waiting for a rich relative to leave something in their will, hoping for a rich relative, focusing on “marrying rich,” winning big at a casino.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I need someone to save me – rescue me from my debts. I need to win the lottery.”
Theme song titles: “Rescue Me” (Aretha Franklin), "Save Me" (Queen)
Movie title: "Rescue Me”, “Save Me”
Movie quotes: “Whoever you are—I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.” (Blanch Dubois from "A Streetcar Named Desire"); “Help me. I’m poor.” (Annie from "Bridesmaids")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Cinderella, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty, Blanche Dubois
Shadow Side: Inaction, inertia, dependency/co-dependency, victim/victimhood
Light Side: Positivity, hopeful optimism, openness
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to take responsibility for my own finances.
Affirmation:
I am responsible for—and with—my finances.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Taking responsibility for and with my finances is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Money Victim / Financial Fatalist
The Money Victim / Financial Fatalist Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves financial focus and identity based on what happens(ed) “to” you in the past, blaming others/things for being stuck financially - with no real and committed proactive steps taken towards moving forward to transform a - figurative and literal - poor financial situation.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Theme song title: "It's All Your Fault" (Pink), "You're to Blame" (MercyMe)Movie titles: “Victim”, "It's Your Fault"
Movie quote: “I swore I would become someone else and I did! And now I’m more miserable than ever! And I’m a mess – and I’m starving!” (Emily Montgomery from “In and Out”)
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: EeyoreShadow Side: Blaming, shirking personal responsibility, indecision, inaction, inertia, dependency/co-dependency, victim/victimhood
Light Side: Careful, discerning
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to release the past, move towards a positive future, and take full responsibility for my own finances.
Affirmation:
I am fully engaged and responsible for—and with—my finance—today and every day.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Being fully present—and anchored in the present—I now take full responsibility for and with my finances—and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Afraid and Frozen
The Afraid and Frozen Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves being at a literal standstill—stuck, paralyzed, afraid, and feeling unable to make any financial decisions.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I can’t do that! I’m too afraid. I’m scared of making the wrong decisions – so instead – I’m not going to make any decisions at all!"Movie titles: “Frozen”, “Fear”
Movie quote: “Me?! I’m scared of everything! I’m scared of what I saw, of what I did, of who I am…” (Baby from "Dirty Dancing")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: The Cowardly Lion
Shadow Side: Inertia, inaction, indecision
Light Side: Careful, discerning, taking decisive action
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to breathe, take positive decisive action, and move forward while improving my financial situation.
Affirmation:
I am moving forward! I am taking positive and decisive action toward positively transforming my financial situation.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Fully expecting that the highest / best / greatest outcome will manifest in the money department of my life, I move forward and take positive action steps—feeling safe and confident—and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Bad Boy / Bad Girl
The "Bad Boy"/ "Bad Girl" Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves focusing on “get-rich-quick” scenarios and schemes without doing due diligence, lacking concern for ethics, morals, personal integrity, and (perhaps) even legality of the offering. Additionally, they may be a willful disregard for the potentially negative consequences of going down these types of paths.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I don't care if it's right or if it's wrong. It's time for me to get what I deserve. I worked hard for this - and I'm going to take what is mine. It's my turn!"Theme song titles: “Get Rich Quick!” (Little Richard), “Opportunities” (Pet Shop Boys), "I Don't Want to Be Right" (Luther Ingram), "It's All About the Benjamins" (P. Diddy et al.)
Movie titles: “Risky Business”, “Dirty Rotten Scoundrels”, “Bad Boys”, “Bad Girls”, “The Wolf of Wall Street”, "It's All About the Benjamins"
Movie quote: “The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that greed, for lack of a better word, is good.” (Gordon Gekko from "Wall Street")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Bernie Madoff, Ponzi schemes
Shadow Side: Risky, not necessarily on the "up-and-up"
Light Side: With due diligence and discernment-perhaps high gains
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to do my due diligence when it comes to investing and financial gains opportunities.
Affirmation:
I am careful and discerning with my financial investments and make better financial decisions when I do my due diligence.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Being a good steward of my money, I make sound and beneficial financial decisions based on doing my due diligence.
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is See! I Told ME So!
The "See! I Told ME So!" approach means the go-to mode involves thinking mostly negative thoughts, creating negative self-talk, and manifesting negative self-fulfilling prophesies about anything related to money and finances.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: “I knew it! I knew it was going to happen! This ALWAYS happens to me!”; "Bad luck is just my lot in life."; Being rich is not in my cards."
Theme song title: “I Knew You Were Trouble” (Taylor Swift), "I Should Have Known Better" (The Beatles)
Movie titles: “The Prophet", "The Prophecy", "I Told You So"
Movie quote: “They f*** you at the drive-thru, okay? They f*** you at the drive-thru! They know you're gonna be miles away before you find out you got f***ed! They know you're not gonna turn around and go back, they don't care. So…who gets f***ed?! Ol' Leo Getz! Okay, sure! I don't give a f***! I'm not eating this tuna, okay?” (Leo Getz from "Lethal Weapon 2" – after ordering from a drive-thru and receiving a wrong order)
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Eeyore, a mirror
Shadow Side: The fulfillment of negative self-fulfilling prophecies; proving you were right about predicting and expecting something wrong to happen
Light Side: Expecting and predicting that whatever is for your highest / greatest benefit will happen
Support For Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to release the past, move towards a positive future, and expect that the best / greatest outcome will manifest in the money department of my life.
Affirmation:
I am excited about my financial future!
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Fully expecting that the highest / best / greatest outcome will manifest in the money department of my life, I move forward and take positive action steps—feeling safe and confident—and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Money Martyr
The Money Martyr Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves using religion / religious and/or self-righteous beliefs and attitudes as a defense and excuse for inaction and adopting a victim mentality as permission to avoid taking personal responsibility by putting in the time and effort to achieve a desired financial outcome.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "It is more spiritual to be poor than to be rich. Money changes people and I don’t want to change /I don’t want anything to change."; "Rich people are corrupt-and they had to do corrupt things to get their wealth and to maintain it."; "It is more humble to be poor than to be rich-and God wants us to be humble."Theme song titles: “[Don’t] Rock the Boat” (Hues Corporation), “Woe is Me” (The Cadillacs), "Money Changes Everything" (Cyndi Lauper)
Movie titles: "Poor Little Rich Girl", "The Perils of Pauline"
Movie quote: “Play the victim and you will be the victim.” (Frank Powell from "Hot Rod")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: "The Church Lady"
Shadow Side: Judgemental - and justifies being judgemental; inertia; inaction; shirking personal responsibility
Light Side: Earnestness; wanting to do what is in integrity and in alignment with strongly held values
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to make sound financial decisions and take sound financial actions that are in alignment with my core beliefs.
Affirmation:
I am thoughtful, careful, and discerning with my financial decisions and actions while being a good steward of my financial resources.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Being a good steward of my money, I make sound and beneficial financial decisions and actions based on my core values and convictions.
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Eyes-Shut
The Eyes-Shut Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves keeping one's head under-the-covers / head-in-the-sand, blindly forging ahead without taking due diligence, and proactive financial measures.
Light Side: After surveying information and facts - intentionally and consciously following one's inner guidance/intuition when intentionally making financial decisions and taking financial actions.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I don't want to know. I would rather not know. Don't tell me anything."Theme song titles: “Darts In The Dark" (MAGIC!), "Better Not to Know" (Amy Grant), "The Less I Know The Better" (Tame Impala)
Movie titles: "Eyes Wide Shut"
Movie/television quote: "I see nothing! I hear nothing! I know nothing!" (Sergeant Schultz from "Hogan's Heroes")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Throwing darts in the dark; a blindfold
Shadow Side: Intentional ignorance, negligence, recklessness, and disregard for knowledge and truth - which can result in being easily manipulated and swayed
Shadow Side: Intentional ignorance, negligence, recklessness, and disregard for knowledge and truth - which can result in being easily manipulated and swayed
Light Side: After surveying information and facts - intentionally and consciously following one's inner guidance/intuition when intentionally making financial decisions and taking financial actions.
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to do my due diligence, be aware of the facts, and make financial decisions and actions based on the facts.
Affirmation:
I am informed, making educated financial decisions, and making sound financial action steps while being a good steward of my money.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Being a good steward of my money, I make sound and beneficial financial decisions and actions based on my research, due diligence, and sound information - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Reactive
The Reactive Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves mostly taking action while in a reactive/triggered/negative state.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I don't want to hear what you have to say or what about what you did-or why! I am mad-and I am going to do something about it!"Theme song titles: “Reaction" (Rebbie Jackson), "Chain Reaction" (Diana Ross)
Movie titles: "Reaction", "Mad as Hell"
Movie quote: "I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!" (Howard Beale from "Network")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Pinball machine, popcorn, volcano, boiling pot
Shadow Side: Making rash decisions based on impulsive (and mostly negative) feelings
Shadow Side: Making rash decisions based on impulsive (and mostly negative) feelings
Light Side: Increased self-awareness and knowing when off-balance/off-center and taking actions steps to regain and reclaim inner peace and tranquility
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention
My intention is to quickly identify when I need to take a time-out, center myself, and regain inner peace before I make financial decisions and take money-related actions.
Affirmation
I am making beneficial and sound financial decisions from a place of knowledge, inner peace, and tranquility.
Declaring & Claiming Statement
I make sound financial decisions from a place of knowledge, centeredness, and tranquility - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is I'll Show Them! / Retaliatory
The "I'll Show Them!"/Retaliatory Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves wanting to prove a high / higher financial status to others—doing things for “show” in an attempt to inflate the ego-and wanting to "prove" something to others.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I'll show them!"; "I told you/them so!"; "They are going to regret they ever doubted me/dismissed me/ignored me."
Theme song titles: “Prove You Wrong" (Sheryl Crow), "Prove Them Wrong" (Slopes), "Proving Everybody Wrong" (Tucker Beathard)
Movie titles: "Proof", "Something to Prove"
Movie quote: "I will prove all of you wrong! Now the race begins!" (Gustav Ditters from "Tour de Pharmacy"), "She will rue the day." (Cal from "Crazy, Stupid, Love.")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Waiving a clenched fist
Shadow Side: Making rash decisions based on impulsive (and mostly negative) feelings - in an attempt to prove something to someone else/others.
Shadow Side: Making rash decisions based on impulsive (and mostly negative) feelings - in an attempt to prove something to someone else/others.
Light Side: Highly self-motivated to do your best, to challenge yourself to improve upon something
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to focus on my personal finances while taking conscious actions to achieve my monetary goals-from a place of inner centeredness and peace.
Affirmation:
I am making beneficial and sound financial decisions from a place of equilibrium, knowledge, inner peace, and tranquility.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
I consciously make sound financial decisions from a place of knowledge, centeredness, and tranquility - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Never Enough
The Never Enough Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves rarely pausing to enjoy, savor, delight in, and be grateful for the bounty that is already at your disposal. This is an insatiable "my glass is bottomless and always empty" perspective and approach-creating constant inner and outer wheels to spin towards a, most likely, unknown or vague destination. The word "never" pops-up quite frequently when thinking and speaking about money. Experiencing a relentless grind - and perceiving a sense of futility and lack of forward financial movement and progress.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: "I'll never have enough money."; "I'll never make enough money."; "No matter how much I try or how many hours I work-it is never enough to just make ends meet."; "It is useless. What's the point? I am always behind financially."; "I have done everything I could - and nothing works! I am still working my butt-off - and for what?!"Theme song titles: “16 Tons” (Tennessee Ernie Ford / ZZ Top), “Never Enough” (Loren Allred from “The Greatest Showman”), “She Works Hard for the Money” (Donna Summers)
Movie titles: "Never Enough", "Relentless"
Movie quote: "My name is Carrie. During the day, I teach way too many classes for way too little money. So I'm here to try to make a little extra cash, so I can afford such luxuries as rent and antibiotics - because this job makes me sick sometimes." (Carrie from "Night School")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Hamster running on a wheel
Shadow Side: Feeling pressured and anxious about personal finances; perceiving insurmountable problems and challenges with keeping one's "head above water while being drowned in debt"; "getting ahead" - or possibly even "making ends meet"
Shadow Side: Feeling pressured and anxious about personal finances; perceiving insurmountable problems and challenges with keeping one's "head above water while being drowned in debt"; "getting ahead" - or possibly even "making ends meet"
Light Side: Earnestness, tenaciousness, goal-oriented, driven, highly motivated
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to experience the money department of my life with renewed energy while focusing on - and experiencing - financially favorable results.
Affirmation:
I am making beneficial and sound financial decisions with renewed energy and optimism from a place of equilibrium, knowledge, inner peace, and tranquility.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
With renewed energy and optimism, I consciously make sound and smart financial decisions-freeing my time and energy to focus on what I enjoy doing - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Cash Cavalier / Cavalier With Cash
The Cash Cavalier / Cavalier With Cash Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves a tendency to be irresponsible – and at times reckless – with money, turning a blind eye towards personal finances - especially expenditures. At times - and perhaps more often than not- as a result of not being attentive and taking personal responsibility with money - ends up in financial binds and in debt.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: “It’s only money! No big deal!”, “I can’t be bothered with the details”; “Details – schmee-tails! I’m a free spirit!”, “I can’t be bothered with a budget. It is too restricting.”, "I can't take it with me - so I might as well spend it today!"Theme song titles: “I'm Too Sexy" (Right Said Fred)
Movie titles: "Free Spirit", "Reckless"
Movie quote: “It’s very expensive to be me.” (Anna from “Anna Nicole Story”)
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Blindfold, free-falling
Shadow Side: Often not considering actions (over-spending) have consequences (perhaps debt, bad credit, and so on). Likely an unwillingness to take personal responsibility for personal finances.
Shadow Side: Often not considering actions (over-spending) have consequences (perhaps debt, bad credit, and so on). Likely an unwillingness to take personal responsibility for personal finances.
Light Side: Deems money as a not-all-encompassing and full-time focus. Enjoys the benefits of having an expendable income.
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to take personal responsibility for my personal finances and to be engaged in the handling of my money in a way that supports the lifestyle I want to live.
Affirmation:
I am making taking personal responsibility for the state of my finances while making sound decisions that will support and sustain the lifestyle I want to live.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
I am the captain of my cash! I consciously commit to making informed decisions about how and where to save and spend my financial resources-that support the lifestyle I desire to experience - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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Your Result Type is Money Miser
The Money Miser Money Relationship Approach means the go-to mode involves a tendency to be tight-fisted with money with a honker-down and batten-the-hatches view of financial resources. Spending money-if money is to even be spent at all - can seem quite challenging - as it is engrained to always "save for a rainy day." With a tendency to perceive money in a doom and gloom light - there also seems to be an underlining thread of lack and/or scarcity as it relates to financial resources.
Things Associated with this Money Relationship Approach
Self-talk/mottos: “I can’t spend money on _____. I have to save for a rainy day – and it is always a rainy day ahead.”
Theme song titles: “Never Enough” (Loren Allred from "The Greatest Showman"), "Batten Down the Hatch" (Snow Patrol)
Movie titles: "Scrooged", "Ebenezer"
Movie/television quote: "A fool and his money are soon parted." (Robert Crawley from "Downton Abbey"); "My mom taught me to save for a rainy day." (Carrie Mathison from "Homeland")
Archetypes/iconic touchstones: Ebenezer Scrooge, Scrooge McDuck
Shadow Side: Often considered "cheap", a "cheapskate", or a "tightwad" as it relates to spending money. There is a tendency toward being extremely-to-excessively cautious, a bit fearful about lack and scarcity, and being pessimistic - with a predisposition towards hoarding - as it relates to money.
Light Side: Consciously discerning and careful with making financial decisions - weighing the benefits/risks/rewards of investments and expenditures - with the goal of experiencing life-long financial stability
Support for Your Money Relationship
Intention:
My intention is to be flexible about the flow of money - both incoming and outgoing - in my life.
Affirmation:
I am enjoying the purchases I make, the donations I give, and the financial resources that I am able to use and share with others.
Declaring & Claiming Statement:
Being a good steward of my financial resources, I am wise and careful - making informed decisions - about both the inflow and outflow of money in my life - and I give myself permission to enjoy my money - and that is empowering!
©Dr. Linda Humphreys
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